*Also on theindiasatire.com*
It’s an action-packed
story. No, it is a thriller. Alright, let
us not be partial, it is an action-packed
suspense oriented melodramatic emotional thriller.
This is not an ordinary punar-janam script. It is the Baap of all of them.
It goes like:
Once upon a time in the urban fartlands of Dilligarh there lived a rustic and
dreadful Thakur. Thakur Durgandh Singh. Durgandh? Because his presence created an
atmosphere of durgandh-read toxic gases-
in the village. The two sons of Thakur, Nitrate Singh
and Sulphate Singh, had intoxicated the
atmosphere of the village by setting up
many industries and construction units that emitted noxious gases. Particulate
and construction dust lingered now on the otherwise clean air of Dilligarh.
People were afraid of their presence. Where other villagers moved in cart or
bicycle, Thakur and his crony family,
sister BEHENzene and mother AMMAnia
vroomed past on dusty roads in their
motor vehicle. The naive villagers did never object to the noxious gases
their vehicle emitted and consoled themselves with just covering their nose
with a torn piece of cloth. Whoever raised his or her voice against Thakur khandaan polluting habits were meted a capital punishment of
forever living in toilet-less slum. The
ignominy and horror of openly defecating in a field ensured that no one ever
attempted a dissent. The tyranny of Thakur khandan
abjectly left the villagers to meekly surrender and suffer in an atmosphere of above
permissible limits of Durgandh, Behenzene, AMMAnia, Nitrate and Sulphate.
In the same village lived an innocent coughing self-acclaimed Aam Aadmi's Aam Aurat-Kejriamma.
To clear doubts, Kejriamma was not the elder sister of Kaveri Amma of SRK starrer Swades. Where Kaveri Amma of Swades had
no child, Kejriamma had two-Yes you guessed it right- Odd Singh and Even Singh.
The new avatar of Karan Singh and Arjun
Singh.
Kejriamma’s honest and toiling husband was diagnosed
with Aajeevan coughing due to the suspended particulates in the village
atmosphere. He once braved to enter the obnoxious haveli of Thakur to resent
and complain about the rising figures of venomous gases in the village. The
offended Thakur inturn asphyxiated him in a gassing chamber.
Her two sons were so much traumatized by their
mother’s cough, masked people around them and father's death that they
concocted a devious plan to demean Thakur's ego.
Legends have it that the plan devised by the two
went on to be recognized as Kejriamma's Odd-Even
formulae.
On every odd date,
Odd Singh deflated all Odd Number vehicles of Thakur's entourage. On the even date, Even Singh deflated all even numbered
vehicles. They were kind enough to spare the vehicles of women, though. Thakur
was offended by this audacity of ordinary people and before the formulae became
an insurrection, he gassed Odd and Even on the 15th day after the plan started.
Aggrieved by the loss of her sons an enraged Kejriamma
vowed the words which I was so eager to write and you were desperate for since
the beginning of this teary saga " Mere Odd-Even Aayenge, Durgandh Singh Mere Odd-Even Aayenge"
Kejriamma’s prayers and belief were answered full
two months after the inhuman massacre of her sons. People recall that on 15th
of April when the village was dark as dungeon
and a cauldron of heat and dust enveloped
its periphery, two figures rose like a shadow over the smoky sullen air of
Dilligarh. The Odd and Even version-2.0 had returned to haunt the senses of
Thakur and his family. Simple villagers who were accustomed to smoke and gas saw the rebirth of Odd and Even as the harbinger of
good days. Some thought Odd-Even return is another obscure event and will die
soon as version-1.0. But the once famed
Odd-Even formulae scared the hell out of
Thakur’s family. Soon Odd-Even- as the famed Karan-Arjun- destroyed every
member of Thakur Durgandh Singh’s family.
They were shown the limits of propriety and dared not to cross ever the threshold
set by the public at large ever after.
‘Ho! ye bandhan to pyar ka bandhan hai…’ did you just hum this song? Did you just think that this story had a happy ending like every stale Bollywood script. Then let me remind you, my friend, this is 2016 and not mid 90s. Conclusion is not the genre of today. Something in the end exists to keep nagging the frail human mind. So it is here. Remember, Thakur and his noxious family were only shunned for a meagre 15 days. Evil in any form refrains from dying easy. Probably the rise of Odd-Even-Dobara will not suffice to give a cleaner atmosphere to denizens of Dilligarh. Probably Odd-Even may need not one, but several rebirths in many forms to quell the tyranny of many Durgandh Singhs.
More to yoy in- Odd-Even - 3.0.
Thankyou for reading
Thankyou for reading
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